Recipe for Disaster...

Words cannot describe how much the kids and I are enjoying this fabulous spring weather! We have been outside everyday for hours at a time. A new routine has begun since after naps there is actually daylight left. The kids get up, and we all go outside to play. After a few hours, I head inside to start supper while the kids continue their play. I prop the back door open so I can hear them; this also allows them to come and go if they need me or need to get a drink.

For those who have not seen our back steps, they are a little scary to say the least. I've provided a picture so you can see the steep, concrete, coupled with no railing. This obviously makes me nervous because Braden sometimes has trouble with his center of gravity, and Avery is, well...clumsy.

Today was no different, except that one of the neighbor's kids was here playing too. (That's a side story in itself. I love the fact that my kids are getting old enough to have friends over to play with by themselves...this week, two of the four neighbor's kids have been over to play...)

So...imagine: back door propped open. Me, back and forth between dining room and kitchen. Braden, in and out.

All moms out there know the zone you get in where you hear the things going on around you, but aren't necessarily focused in on them...imagine me in that place.

Another piece of this puzzle: Braden's police motorcycle that Santa brought him. He loves this, but it stays inside most of the time because it's small enough to ride around inside, and I don't want the wheels to get all messed up if he takes it outside.

...Back to the not really focused zone....

I faintly hear Braden say, "I get my poyeece motosicul..."

The statement barely registers with me. I hear him hop on his police motorcycle and head off.

Then I realize the door. Propped open.

Then the cries begin; followed with Avery's screams, "he drove..well, not really drove..he flipped down the stairs!" (Braden never cries about falls, bumps, etc. unless he is truly hurting.)

I bolt to the door not knowing what to expect. Broken bones? Gashes? Missing teeth? At least blood?

None. of. the. above!

God is truly good. What could have been a night in the ER was only a minor abrasion on his face and hand. Wow.

Other than the fact that he wasn't hurt, I am so so so glad that I didn't have to see it happen. My heart was pounding enough at the thought of what could have been.

On the other hand, poor Avery will probably have nightmares tonight.

Experienced This?

I am debating whether this is too personal to post for the world to read, but I am curious to see if anyone else has dealt with something similar. Avery probably won't like the idea 10 years from now that I wrote this so publicly, but she'll just have to get over it.

I'll start back at the fact that I have always had strange, wacky dreams. Those don't normally bother me, and in some cases, I've wondered if I have basis to write a book or movie from some of them. Unfortunately, mixed with the crazy dreams, there are also terrible nightmares.

I remember as far back to two years old, being terrified to go to sleep because of these nightmares, most of them reoccurring ones. To this day, I have yet to escape those same dreams, although I know now they aren't real.

Ever since my kids were born, I've been worried that they will experience the bad dreams as I did. Unfortunately, my fears have been confirmed, and Avery's wild imagination continues in her dreams as well.

There is nothing worse than looking into your child's eyes, and seeing nothing but fear there. I've been able to figure out and eliminate certain shows, movies, books, or ideas that seem to trigger her nightmare spells. It seems that we have limited, but not been rid of, her worries.

I don't think there will be a way to get rid of her bad dreams altogether, and that's not even why I write this.

There have been 5 times, that I can remember, where Avery wakes screaming, wild eyed, staring into space, and jabbering nonsense. It is really a frantic, scary experience for whomever runs to tend to her because she doesn't make any sense, and she can't stop crying. Normally Kenny has to take care of her because I panic since it scares me beyond measure that I can't snap her out of whatever it is.

Last night, I was closer to her when she started screaming, so I went to her. It scared me that it was one of 'those' situations and not 'just a bad dream.' I held her and tried to talk to her, but she only kept repeating, "I need it! I need it!" between babbles of nonsense. At first she looked like she was pointing to one of her blankets, so I handed it to her. She turned it over in her hands indifferently, then began her frantic crying and screaming, "I need it!" Holding and rocking her wasn't enough, so I swept her off the bed and cradled her on my way to the light switch. I thought if I could get it bright enough she would wake up. That didn't seem to work, then she screamed louder and more frantically that she "needed it!" I was about to take her into the bathroom, when she couldn't control her bladder anymore. It was so sad because she was shaking and crying and seemed so helpless. I don't know why I didn't just stay in one place, because I made more of a mess running her to the bathroom. Once there, she still was not completely awake. It wasn't until I started cleaning her up that she snapped out of it. I had used a wipe, so I assumed the cold helped.

I guess she was trying to tell me she needed to go potty, but couldn't get awake enough. I asked her if she wanted to talk about it, but she couldn't seem to remember anything. It was then that I realized the times this had happened before, I normally immediately took her to the bathroom. I hope this never happens again, but if it does, I guess I'll know what I should try first so she won't have to be scared as long.

I've often wondered, and can only assume that this is what people categorize as 'night terrors?' I've had one friend tell me they had similar experiences with their infant, and the only way to wake them up was with a bath. Has anyone else experienced something like this? I'd like to hear what you have tried, or done to help it.