Braden-isms

I'm behind; far, far behind. Here are a few things Braden has done lately that I want to remember.

The kids were playing outside when I heard Avery yell her famous, "BRAden!" Seconds later the door swooped open with Braden stating, "I'm telling on MYself." Avery soon trudged behind him, hair and face dripping wet, speechless...

Earlier that day they were watching the workers pick up the trash. We talked about how hard they were working and that we should put our best into whatever it is we are doing. Braden then asked if he could be a 'trash trucker' when he grew up. "I don't know how to drive, so I probably couldn't do that part, but I do know how to pick up trash! I could do that!!"

On the way to church that night, the kids were being crazy, and a little gross in the back of the van. I announced, "Ok guys; let's not be so immature. Avery asked, "what's immature?" Kenny answered, "It means you're acting like you're two instead of six." Braden added, "Heehee; toot toot!"

After church on the way home, the kids were equally as hyper. I observed, "wow guys; you are crazy! Should we have cut out those cinnamon rolls you had for dessert?" {Long pause} Braden questioned with concern, "How do you cut them out?"

Avery-isms

Avery had been playing with my phone during Braden's soccer game and didn't know I had taken it back. I heard her realize, "oh no! Where is momma's phone!?" she gathered some friends for a search party under the bleachers. One friend pointed out a flower with which Avery responded adamantly, "I KNOW it's pretty, but DON'T look at it because we HAVE to find this PHONE!!"

Bradenism

This morning during breakfast Braden decides, "Momma, I'm don't like babies. I think I'm allergic to them."

My Little Tree Hugger

Avery has always been my little conscientious one regarding all things earth. Whether it's concerning recycling, not littering, or wasting natural resources, Avery will be the first to correct you.

(On a side note, I think her fabulous teacher, Mrs. Cummings, added even more brownie points in Avery's book yesterday when she told the class, "The Earth is NOT your trashcan..")

But I digress.

Today while on the way to school Avery told me of all the things she and her friends did at recess yesterday. During the part where they all gathered up rocks, sticks, etc, she remembered she found a humongous piece of bark. "Oh man!" She sputtered. "I should have saved that bark and given it to the paper makers to use since that tree was already cut apart. I really, really don't want them to have to cut down a whole other tree! Especially those trees because they are so beautiful!"

More Bradenisms

While watching the beginning of Tom and Jerry, where the lion roars, Braden states: "Momma, if that lion were here in the living room with us, I would.....I would....well, would you pick me up and run?!"

I stumbled upon..

One of Avery's latest. I guess she wanted the Barbies to go for a walk...er, uh, ride?

Who Knew

That bruises came in all shapes and sizes? Well, we all know that really, but who knew they came in the shape of HEARTS?!

The Cookie Tree

Today Avery, Braden and I were enjoying a cookie for our dessert when Avery began her latest quandry.

"Momma; why did Cookie Monster have to use magic to grow a cookie tree?"

I laughed, and recalled the Sesame Street episode from which her question arose.

"Well, God only decided to make apple, peaches, cherry, pecan,...(blah blah blah)....trees." I replied.

She thought for a minute then said, "Oh. Well, it's just too bad that God didn't decide to make cookie trees. Then we would have always have PLENTY of cookies!" (picture arms opening wide here...)

I laughed and added, "Well. I think God knows best because He realizes if we were walking along and ate too many apples, or peaches, or something like that, we would probably be ok because they are healthy. But if we were walking along and came upon a cookie tree, we might eat too much and get sick!"

We continued munching. I thought she had completed her thought. I moved on to cleaning up Braden's chocolatey hands and face, then headed to the kitchen. Soon I heard the following from the dining room.

"Well; since God can do anything, he could make a cookie tree with just the right amount of cookies on it so if we ate them all, we wouldn't get sick."

Expressions

Everyone has seen Avery's crazy expressions, but have you seen Braden's latest?! He has always been entertaining, and I finally have proof.

"cheese!"

He discovered this one on the way home from church tonight!

You will also see how smug he is with his favorite past time of sitting on Barlow. This was before Barlow tumped him off!

Bad Mom?

...Not because of what happens in the video, but because I laughed. Hard. Don't blink; you might miss it.

You can listen to Avery and me talk if you want, but that's not the best part....(it's at the beginning).

Braden's New Trick.

Braden discovered this new trick after naptime one afternoon this week. He thinks it's hilarious; as do we! I wish I had not stopped taping because the finale is him throwing himself backward. Enjoy!

And So It Begins...

Bathtime for the kids used to be one of my favorite times. Then came Avery's broken arm, which turned bathtime into a hassle since the kids could not take one together. Now that the cast fiasco is over, the fun has not returned to bathtime.

For me anyway.

The kids love it more than ever. I'm just tired of being completely soaked by the end of it all.

So on Monday night I decide to try a new tactic.

Start Braden's bath first.

Get him clean.

Add Avery.

Let them play for a bit. (Small bit.)

Take Braden out, and give him to Kenny.

Bathe Avery.

Let her play.

This way they both enjoy their bath alone and with each other, but it is not as stressful for me.

I say all of this to begin my story.

During the "adding Avery" stage of the process, I realize that she is gazing at Braden's "special area." I continue to watch her to see where this will go. She stops looking at him long enough to look at herself.

Finally her eyes meet mine briefly before she follows Braden as he turns his back on her.

Then it comes.

"Momma, what's that hole? I don't have one."

For some reason this is super hilarious to me. I wondered how long it would take her to notice their differences. Then hole? Weird description.

I say, "well honey, God made boys and girls differently."

(I'm trying to think of what I will say next because her newest word is "WHY?")

Luckily the 'why' is replaced with an, "oh."

"So, momma, you look like me?"

(Kenny enters the bathroom while I respond with a yes.)

"And Daddy, you look like Braden?"

I fill him in on the details. He snorts and adds, "well, sort of."

And surprisingly, the conversation is over. She's satisfied with that.

I'm preparing now for her future, probing questions that are sure to come.

Need A Lift?

My little man, hitchin' a ride!

Literal Lady

Avery has a tendency to reiterate whatever has just been said, either to herself, or to anyone who will listen.

A conversation can go like this.

I will say, "Avery, you need to get in your seat so we can eat."

Avery will spout, "I need to get in my seat so I can eat, Daddy," as if he didn't hear me say it in the first place.

I remember in pre-marital counseling that it was important when communicating to repeat what you heard the person say. Most of the time we hear things much differently than what is said.

Avery would be fantastic at that exercise because she repeats what is said, normally in different words but with the same message....usually.

This morning she asked where her Daddy was. I said, "He had to go back to work today. It stinks that he can't be with us all the time like he has been lately."

She answered....

.... "Daddy had to go back to school because he stinks?"

Avery-isms

Braden's umbilical chord fell off this morning. Avery was beside me helping me change his diaper. She proceeded to say, "Uh oh, momma. It broke. We need to fix it. Let's get some tape!"

Braden's hands are peeling really badly and Avery says, "Yuck, Momma; he needs to wash his hands."

Hide And Seek

I've always warned that you have to be careful what you say around Avery, or around any child for that matter, because they pick up on everything! Phone calls, television, and conversations taking place in other rooms are always up for grabs for little ears to hear.

I noticed once again today that she likes to be grown up and in turn, mimicks my every move. During a wild game of Hide And Seek, I ran to hide (because she counts to ten super fast), and soon after the "ready or not, here I come" I heard the following.

"Is she behind the curtains? No."

"Is she behind the frog? No."

"Is she in the closet? No."

Then her voice got closer and more anxious as I could tell she was nervous that I might possibly be right around the corner...

"Is..she...behind...the.....COUCH! YES!" As I jumped out to scare her.

Maybe it just struck me funny, but apparently that's the kind of things she hears from me when I'm seeking her. "Is she behind the chair? No. The futon? No. The door? No. Under the covers? Yes!"

I love how kids learn from observation.

Name Game

This past Monday, Kenny, Avery and I went to Target to return/exchange some things. While we were there, Kenny and I talked across the medicine aisles. He said, "Jamey, I found it." I soon heard Avery echo, "Jamey, I found it!" Really was funny at the time.

This morning, Avery was rolling around on the floor and Curtis walked by. She said, "There's my puppy dog; his name is Curtis."

I said, "it sure is; what's your name?"

She said, "Avery."

I asked what my name was. She said, "Momma....ummmm..Jamey!"

I laughed and asked what daddy's name was. She replied, "Kenny!"

I guess it's time for us to switch to 'Momma' and 'Daddy' full time!